Hair in my daal

One day I was talking with Mr. Goldfarb, or whatever is his name. You see, Mr. Goldfarb is a my long term friend from the days of Yahoo Messenger. He is 10 years older than me and is from some part of Europe. We only know the ‘a’ and the ’s’ about each other, leaving the ‘l’. Heck, I don’t even know his real name. And he knows me by Alibaba007. It was really great alias, kind of badass with so much mystery around it. I have always been proud of myself for owning the name. I can think of thousands who must have tried to have this name, only for them to see a ‘Sorry! Username already taken message’

Mr. Goldfarb is an average looking guy even by Indian standards. What I really mean is that if he comes to India, no ovaries would explode. He is about 6 feet tall with golden hair and a short nose. We have talked a lot over the years on YM, everything and anything. He says he has had many girl friends, which were out of his league. He used to tell me stories about his high school and college days like sneaking in cupboards and stealing bicycles, which I find funny. I had figured it very soon that he was kind of a loser and didn’t have any real friends. I treated all his stories as fiction, until he told me his greatest story. 

When I was 18, I had the biggest crush on this girl. She was taller than me, lean and had the most strange eyes I had seen. She was very hot for me. I wanted to talk to her, but I didn’t really know what to say to her to introduce myself. So I told Mr. Goldfarb about this issue, and having heard his tales, I didn’t ask him for advise. I simply asked him that how he had got the courage to ask out so many beautiful girls. It was then he told me his story of this girl her met one night, Miss Kathy. 

Miss Kathy was a pretty looking girl. When Mr. Goldfarb saw her, he realised immediately that she wouldn’t pay much attention to a guy like him. She too had very strange but romantic eyes. Mr. Goldfarb had been lucky as she had recently broken up and was too sad and too drunk to bother about much. They had a little chat before she was almost asleep. He realised the potential of the night, and like any half decent male in his 20s, took Miss Kathy to her rented room. They started kissing each other and Mr. Goldfarb was half naked before he knew. Then, he says, a great thing happened. Miss Kathy removed all her clothes at once. She was standing there stark naked in the small, well lit room. Mr. Goldfarb saw her clearly. She had an voluptuous figure and looked even radiant now. Then he saw just below the abdomen. There were quite a few dark hair, in no real shape. It looked like moss from the outside of well. He stared at the area for a while, while Miss Kathy walked towards him. That area was interfering with the rest of her perfect body. It was such a contrast to the fairness of the rest of the body that it almost looked ugly.  Mr. Goldfarb couldn’t believe it. It was as bad as his and this made Miss Kathy as average as him and as un-outstanding as him.

He was astonished by his thoughts. What happened next between Miss Kathy and him he never told me. He says that their is no one who is out of the league. Every beautiful girl is as simple as god made them biologically. This was his secret. He never approached any person with the thought that they were above him in the social hierarchy.

When I heard it, I was too young to understand it properly and merely thought about it as another bogus story of Mr.Goldfarb. I recently contacted him after a gap of 2 years. He sent me pictures of him with his family in a vineyard in Paris. He looked ultra rich and I concluded he has inherited everything from his family business.